Kender and Jarod are going in for their next EUA (exam under anesthesia) on Monday. Every single time any of the kids goes in, the hospital has to call three times, first to do admission (insurance type info), second to do intake (medical history), and third to give us a time. You'd think at least the first (and maybe part of the second) could be skipped after the first one, but whatever.

So this lady today doing the intake on Jarod asks what his birth weight was. I said, "8-10."

"Wow, that's a big boy!"

"Not really," I said, "he wasn't my biggest."

"He wasn't?"

"No. His big brother was 10-6, and his baby brother was 10-8."

"Oh my goodness!" she exclaimed. "I hope you had c-sections!"

That's about where my blood started boiling. I asked her, "Have you ever had a c-section?"

"What?"

"Have you ever had a c-section?!"

"No..."

"Then you have no idea what you are talking about! I've had 2 c-sections and 2 vaginal births. A c-section is major surgery, where you're walking around with a hole in your belly for 6 weeks! A vaginal birth is a thousand times easier than a c-section!"

"You mean it didn't feel like pushing a watermelon through a...?"

I interrupted her. "I pushed for 30 minutes and had no tears. It was easy compared to having a c-section. Don't you ever wish a c-section on anybody! What a horrible thing to wish on somebody!"

She eventually shut up and did the rest of the intake. Later, while doing Kender's intake, she asked, "Did he come home from the hospital with you?"

I answered, "He was never in the hospital. He was born at home."

She said nothing. Wise lady.