I'm really enjoying the roller-skating. Last night, I went to the Wednesday night session, and there were more adults and fewer kids, and a better variety of music. I got new bearings for my skates, which upped the cost a bit, but also vastly improved their performance. I was no longer the slowest skater in the rink, and was able to start playing around with them a little bit. I think I'm doing pretty good, for how long I've been back on them.

That's pretty much been my exercise this week. Skating on Saturday night, skating with the girls on Sunday at the Y, skating Wednesday night, skating Thursday morning with the kids. I did get on my bike to run a quick errand this evening.

I just wish I knew why I'm so bloody depressed. It probably is the light. I never get light-box time in the mornings anymore, and when I'm on the computer at night, I don't want to use it because it messes up my sleep. I daydream of going to Texas for the weekend and racking up a nice sunburn while climbing Enchanted Rock or something. That would be nice.

This homesick-for-Texas spurt has got to end sometime. I spend half my free-thought time trying to work out how I can get us back home, even if it involves me working or the kids in school, or both. I briefly considered leaving Brian to do it, but I can't. That wouldn't be worth it (and that's saying something, isn't it?). I don't know what to do. It seems like every passing year makes me more and more miserable to be up here. And I can't talk about it with Brian, because I know it will just upset him and then we're BOTH depressed, and that's not good.

And the depression just leaks over into the rest of my life, and I start thinking everything's terrible, snapping at the kids over school, etc., etc. I think about trying drugs, but really, there are several concrete, non-chemical causes for this. How is taking drugs going to help? I want to go home!

Jarod is sleeping through the night very well, now. He's been going to bed around 11:00, and sleeping until at least 7:30 in the morning, when he just snacks and goes back to sleep for a while. So I decided to have a drink tonight, and checked out DrinksMixer. It's one of those sites where you can fill out a pantry/bar inventory and get a list of drinks you can make, instead of browsing through a ton of drinks you don't have the ingredients for. So I came up with a Tornado. I rated it a 4. It's not bad, but it's straight liquor, and very strong. Although, it certainly does improve the more of it you drink...heh...*slurp*...